My “Chemo Learning” session starts Thursday, and it occurs to me that really what I’m going through, what all of us are going through with this experience is cancer learning. So here is a lesson for me and maybe you from Cancer Learning. I am sure there will be more.
Sentences I don’t love hearing.
– How ARE you (today)? How are you? How are you? I’m fine with that regular “How are you?” we share routinely with colleagues or passers by.
– “You are feeling better” (statement).
– “You look tired” (actually I think this sentence should be removed from the English language with the exceptions of parents to children under 18).
– Any sentence that has at least in it, as in “at least you have a good doctor” or “at least they caught it early” or “at least you have Ken. Thanks, don’t need to hear it.
Sentences I love hearing:
– “I’m looking forward to talking with you”.
– “I’m so glad you are here”.
– “The funniest thing happend at work, or on the way over here or my kid’s grades, or …. (but not politics so much right now).
All the things we’ve laughed over, mused over or chatted over for years are what I want to engage around. Yes, I want to hear about the action in your life, as I always have. Considering retiring? Wondering about college for your kid? Please don’t feel you have to focus our conversation on the “C” in the room. I’ll bring it up if I want and this forum will give regular reports.
And now on to the prayer or good thought or whatatever (look back to a previous post to learn more about this).
Giver of light and wisdom. Please help Alexa hear the love behind the skillfully phrased words of love and please help her equally hear the love behind those that come down less easily. They are all words of love. And let us, her friends develop skill in how to continue our friendships as before with all their dimensions of laughter, sharing and companionship.